Coronation Herm (single and B-side)

Corona Virus (On the Bayou!)
Mass quarantine on the U.I.B til the furlough
Hey look at me! I'm on T.V. with Andrew Cuomo
Stay inside- get a free trial, Porn-Hub Promo
Son-of-a-gun we'll have big fun, Coronavirus!

Dominos Delivery Pizza and nursing
We are essential personell, we're baggin' groceries
Take yer Zink and Hydroxy-coloroquino
Son-of-a-gun we'll have big fun, Coronavirus!

G5? Biological weapons?
Death to Sweden! Who really needs 'em: Nosocomial
Tony Fauchi and the vaccine any day-O
Son-of-a-gun we'll have big fun, Coronavirus!

Mom 'n Dad are teaching class on a cellphone
There's no recess, wear your mask! The playgrounds cordoned
Got it pat - the curve is flat, economy-O
Son-of-a-gun we'll have big fun, Coronavirus!

Mass quarantine on the U.I.B til the furlough
Shelter in place, don't touch your face, get intubatOe'd
El Nuevo Covidito Diecinueve
Son-of-a-gun we'll have big fun, Coronavirus!

the F*lk Song

I don't F*#%ing know what's going on anymore
The writings on the wall but I been seeing double
So which ways out; and which ways Trouble?

Take a looksee 'Whats Inside?'
Kick down the door, come to find out
'Whose behind the lies!" that you been
Spreading about me, riddle my bones
on a Hasbro Ouija

Swing the barndoor wide, wheelbarrow
My mare's manure to a garden on the side
Right there behind them big-old Bushes
Water it down, tie the hose on the spigot

I don't F*#%ing know, so don't ask me
Can't tell ya, bro
F*#% if I know, confound it and F*#% me runnin'
I don't F*#%ing know
I don't F*#%ing know
So tell me why, if you're so smart,
Can't ya hear me? I'm asking you politely now
Leave me the F*#% alone why dontch' Yeh

I can't remember what time Precious told me to pick up
...Was it the Dry-Cleaners?
I'm going down for this one this time Boys I can feel it
Way down in my bones, I can't get along anymore
Loosing all control of my good reputation on
Hookers, and Bookers, and Comodities Traders

Everybodys on the floor screaming at each other
It's the biggest conflagration of high stakes
Agro-Auto-Stimulation this Nations ever seen
Folks call it the Stock Market.
Upon which we base our entire economy
What the F*#% is up with that?
Nobody seems to know.

Its F*#%d six-ways-to-Sunday
Damned if I know what to do about it

Sometimes I think I know, you know?
sometimes knot.
Lately things are shot and here I'm
Carrying on like old Woody Guthrie
at a charity auction.
They say 'third time's the charm"
and "Twide the Fool" but First,
the golden rule: Reload Quickly
'Cause when the shit hits the fan
Gotta be READY!

Everybody on the floor screamin' for their lives
Gunfight in the Ally everybody gonna die, but
Just as the Bourbon is about to tip over...
Out jumps the Leprechaun and hurdles the bar!
Uncorks the Whiskey and lights a cigar
Off a ricocheted buckshot he picked off the floor
Walks through the doorway, wrinkles his nose and
POOF! just disappears into a patch of green clover

I don't know what in Sam Hell is going on around here
but the writings on the wall 
And I been seeing Trouble 
Every which-a-way comin' and going
Well, I'm here to tell ya
I'm outta-the-loop. It may come as a surprise
But got to realize, Honey
I don't F*#%ing Know 

...All Right With Me (LP)

Hey there, Sunshine!
Howzibout another glass o’ wine?
I’m sittin’ here drunk as ah ever been
this ol’boy ain’t never had a girl like you
beside him!
If you want me come get me.
It don’t make no difference to me.
I ain’t never gonna know what hit me anyway.
A dandylion just for you my love!
I got these hiccups drinkin’ champagne
from your shhicoe my love! But don’t let it kill the moment,
its such a thrill to be my woman
I think it’s time you count your blessings
now grab me a napkin I’m spitting up again!
Now Papa told me about women,
if but a word was true you’d all be felons!
But he loved ya and your plump little melons
Oh this awkward silence
cannot dim the love that binds us
We’re so happy wl can just sing
So Hum along...
I’ve always know I’d find you
bathing in the afternoon of a 
For your own sake: be real.
Let me know how you feel.
All we got in life is what we steal

Careful with that Shovel, Slim!
I know there’s something going on around here
I know there’s something going on around here
I know there’s something going on around here
and I don’t like it one little bit
I know there’s something going on around here
I know there’s something going on around here
I know there’s something going on around here
gives me the heebey geebies 
like somones watching me.
Makes me want to jump right outta my skin!

I know I seen your face before, my friend
I know I seen your face before, my friend
I know I seen your face before, my friend
and I don’t like you one little bit
I know I seen your face before, my friend
I know I seen your face before, my friend
I know I seen your face before, my friend
maybe on like News 4 or something?
All I know is you’re a no good sonofabitch!

J'ai une grenouille dans mon bidet
J'ai une grenouille dans mon bidet
J'ai une grenouille dans mon bidet
La police, ne t'a pas encore trouvé
mais il pourrait- se il pourrait
La police, ne t'a pas encore trouvé
Je vous aurais bien aide
mais je ne vous aime pas

It's a Free Country
Go fuck Yourself!
I don't support the troops
killing innocent people!
Do you mean to tell me you didn't know?
Well, it's been like this all along...
Them folks done nothing but get in the way
of Good God Almighty Holy Rollin' U.S.A.
Marching Sherman style all over Iraq.
It's a criminal enterprise front to back
(and they fucked it up on purpose at that)
So George W set out in search of the WMDs
He pulled the plug on the IAEA WIs
and started WWIII, WTF?
That monkey's not my President, 
he's never won a legitimate election and
I'll support the troop when they 
remove this pretender from office by force!
(It’s what I pay ‘em to do!)
It's a free country so go fuck yourself! 
You're so reasonable you make me want to puke!
So you say "Turn the other cheek"
-Whose cheek are you turning? Blessed are the meek
as they are bombed into oblivion?
It’s the American way…
No way! What ways it going to be?
Kellogg Brown & Root or Che Guevara?
Beating prisoners to death 
or admitting we're the terrorists?
Color coded threat levels or fearing only fear itself?
The United States of America in 2007 is not a free country...
...or did I hear you say differently?

River Ford
Oh my eyes sink low
everytime I meet a stranger in the street
whether they be strange or not
I tend to look at their feet
So if I flash a smile pay no mind at all
I, the pitiful fool, pity you, I pity you
you don’t fit your shoes. 

What’s around the corner?
Then there’s you and me,
in this world while facing anonymity
I don’t fight it anymore, fighting don’t help at all
that just wears you thin so, when the wind
picks up again, youre carried off into the sky
and when you land a grain of sand burns your eye

I’m the black, black crow tormented by sparrows
still I try not to care, O my heart it bleeds blue blood
into the river I’m trying so hard to fly over. is it over?

The Ogallala Exit to Lake McConaughey
It's nearly half a day of driving I suggest we don't delay
We'll get to bond- there's nothing on the radio
unless you want to tune it to the station with the tourist information

At the Ogallala Exit to Lake McConaughey
You don't know how to read a map? It doesn't matter anyway
It's big enough for Nessy and tough enough to miss
Unless you really get distracted by the kid there in the back

You take Ogallala Exit to Lake McConaughey
And bring along your boat- we'll do some surfing in the wake
I feel like I should warn ya that this isn't California
But if you feel like some corn then we could cook us up a storm

At the Ogallala Exit to Lake McConaughey
Better get out on the water 'cause the fish are taking bait
...the patience of a fisherman, the cunning of a 30.06 (cr-KOW!)

Take the Ogallala Exit to Lake McConaughey
Where our beers are never lonely and our songs are always gay
Now, don't get all upset if you get slapped upside the head-
He's only trying to relive ya of the pesky darn mosquitoes

At the Ogallala Exit to Lake McConaughey
C'mon! Race you to the docks the last one in'sa rotten egg!
Rub-a-Dub and don't forget to scrub behind your ears and
When you finish in the water rub a towel on your bottom

It's the Ogallala Exit to Lake McConaughey
Time we build a fire child now gather up some twigs
This kerosene should get her going, strike a match...
Stop, Drop & Roll!!! You'll wonder why it's so bright out
As we're blowing out your eyebrows

Here at the Ogallala Exit to Lake McConaughey
Some people call me sentimental- I assure you that I ain't...
I'm only trying to spread the word, the finest place on 
God's green Earth- is off the Ogallala Exit to Lake McConaughey

A Granite Heart
I’m not gonna be sand slipping through your fingers
to the ground; I’ll be a mountain with my head up
in a cloud where the wind howls and the rain pours down
lightning and thunder splinter trees and shake the boulders
so I hold it all together waiting for a change in the weather
the sea will never claim this granite heart

I’m not gonna be sad neither looking out this dirty window
on my mountain I’ll survey all lies below
You can travel far and wide I’ll always have you in my sight
I wonder if you hurt like me inside? When we ought to be 
bound together: instead I’m likely as never to see your
lovely face come through that door again

The tide rolls in the sand will roll it back again
but there’s no end and we’re loosing ground
and all would surely drown were it no for one more grain
com rolling down the mountain: a granite heart
broken by the wind

I’m not gonna be sad sobbing in my pillow
in a high mountain meadow. From here I apprehend
the vast cosmos! In my bedroll under the stars how I wonder
where you are. A cold wind stokes the embers and I long
to hold you tender. But in the wee hours I hear that lonely coyote
howl; he and I both know time is running out.

opus one
So many people out there it makes good sense to run.
Why don't we run in circles? The fun is just begun.
Hop on a Eastbound A train you'll see me on the way,
I'm spinning though a cornfield catching the rain on my tongue.

So many people out there it makes good sense to cry.
We'll pool out tears and make an ocean,
we'll help a penguin fly.
Hop on a Southbound aeroplane you'll see him far below,
he's gazing right upon you; catching the snow in his eye.

So many people out there it makes no sense at all.
Why did you kill that woman who cut you off?

So many people out there sometimes I just don't know.
Why don't we just start over; over and over.
Hop on a southbound aeroplane over his icy home.
He marvels at our folly, I wonder who's the joke?

The one flying through the ocean,
or the one seated in the sky?

Unexpected Company
theres a bad dream in my pantry
I put it there without thinking
I had unexpected company
And no place else to put it
I shoved it in and closed the door
now I’ve no idea what to do
Theres a golf commentator in my refrigerator
I put him there in a fit of anger
He was trying to see what I had going on in my pantry
though I warned him not to do it
I can hear him whisper 
–hey mister would you come on and unlock this door
But I’ll be damned if I’m own play the fool
Theres a dreadful sound coming from my cupboard
sounds n’awful lot like my dear departed mother
she said- Son, you got a house guest and ya skart ‘um
half-to-death, didn’t I teach ya better than that?
as I stood there in my kitchen beset at every turn
by apparitions and television personalities I began to feel
the first pangs of hunger and I wondered what had I done
that I should find myself at this most unwelcome juncture
so I called up my old man, “That you Son?” he answered
as is his custom whereupon I proceeded to appraise him of
the situation and ast him how he thought it might be remmodeid

He said “Boy ya ain’t liein’ I can hear your mother cryin’
Nearly every night as I lie awake in bed, she says
“Your boy ain’t never gonna amount to nothing without
his momma round to kiss and hug him” si I tell her I can only
do my best, now it’s a doggone shame the way that woman 
passed away workin’ chainsaw weren’t no womans place
If she hadn’t got the hiccups we’ll things mighta been diffrant
damn the luck but, honey, it don’t change a thing.
Now you know you got to eat and frankly I could use some sleep
take up thy broom and clean that pantry out, open up the cupboard
tell momma dear thatcha lover but she’s dead god bless her, 
time she rest in peace… now
Did you say you had a golf commentator in your danged ol’ Frigidaire?
By Gum that’s one I ain’t heard before!
Just crack the door so’s he can breath and call me back by middle next week
I oughta have this figgurd so’s we don’t involve the police

Ladybird Blues
come and see my humming bug!
That’s absurd, what can I be thing of?
The sun pours down onto my shoulder
I got a tattoo, but now I’m feeling older
Went up on the mountain for a good look
Man it made me tired as a school book
It took a little while but I noticed
the many patterns of the forest were sublime!
So Fine! I could be the rhythm and the rhyme,
Any little tune that comes to mind: I’d be obliged!
I saw a lizard on a rock. I reached out but then stop
he turned his head and seemed to smile as he said,
“I Ain’t gonna spend the rest of my life
in a specimen jar! And I don’t care who you are!
The speed of light won’t get you very far, you blink
I’m gone!”
Honeybee come see my bumblecomb
Pardon me, I know you like to be alone
but youre always on the hip and in the style
I want to know if you think its worth my wile.
Cuz everybodys got a little something inside
a secret that theyre hiding and somebody out there
got a key to set free the secret I keep.

Lazy Gentlemen
may I have your attention
I been pondering all the dimensions
just don’t seem to get anything done
except one more drag on a cigarette
left in the ashtray- you know
you mention things fit together
well I don’t know but its strange
how a poem that started with nothin’
can grow and turn into somethin’
though it’s nothing I could easily explain

And I cry out, born to an eternity that I’d
never dreamed of
My dearest friends can turn into demons
in my head
Am I dead? Am I forgiven? Am I
to far gone?
All to aware of the sinister intentions
on the carrousel

Some pretty good rationalizations
are making the world go round
and it’s making my head spin
we shiver and shed out skins
snakes in the grass
all she sees is butterflies
so take her on faith swallow a sunray whole
if you want to see a serpent fly I’ll show you
all the proof you need right in the rainbow
The sons of God are Lords among men
the laws we make are laws we bend
and the tarot card ‘Mischief’ is drawn again